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It's time to show you my art work...I've been threatening to do so for a long time.


3 months ago5 min read

I'm always saying how untalented I am at art. I'm not joking about it either; I am literally the worst artist on the planet. Seriously, they did a survey; I have the results.

I know I'm bad at art, but curiously, many here on steem keep telling me how good I could be if I tried. How they know this miraculous piece of information about me I cannot say...However I thought I'd put some effort into an artwork and prove them wrong. Today's the day.

In this post I'm going to draw a self portrait...A full body-length drawing of me and I'm going to make an attempt to capture the true essence of me as accurately as I can. I'll show you the step by step also, so you know it's not plagiarised work, and see my genius in action...Here goes.

Stage one...

The begining...My body starts to take shape here. The keen-eyed among you, the truly gifted artists, will also possibly make out the beginnings of my head, or "noggin",as I often refer to it. You will note, and this is for those who know me well, that it is most accurately depicted as a bulbous and pumpkin-shaped appendage that sits, like most people's heads, upon my neck which is also faithfully recreated here.

On to the next stage...

Here, and after much work, you can see I have added my legs. Particular effort went into recreating the musculature of my legs in minute detail. Again, those familiar with the human body, will note the expert way I have shown my feet, both pointing in opposite directions...I've added this imagery into my artwork to demonstrate the juxtaposition between the "self" who could be an amazing artist and the "self" who is in fact the worlds worst artist. The dichotomy of my inner "artist." Either way, the result is hypnotic, don't you think?

On to the next stage...

Now things begin to really take shape with the addition of my arms and hands. Again, I have taken careful note of my massive biceps, triceps and forearms ensuring that my picture was true to life. You can see here, that when I posed for myself to draw...myself...I adopted a reasonably typical, every-day sort of pose much like you may do yourself many times a day. I believe it lends my piece a certain "joie de vivre", some "Ooo la la." Agree? Artists take note of the pen strokes and how they generally manage not to ever meet cleanly at their juncture-points; More clever imagery to demonstrate my artistic diversity and eclectic "devil may care" attitude towards my craft.

And now the final stage...

Drawing eyes can be difficult...But not for me because, like those steem people suggested, I tried hard. You may think the eyes drawn here are different sizes and the eyeballs are looking in different directions...But no! It is simply my clever drawing ability drawing the eyes so that they follow the viewer, no matter where they shift. Go on, try it out. The same with my ears here...One seems larger than the other but that's also a ruse...It is, indeed, simply perspective being utilised to draw the observer into the picture. Clever huh?

The rest of my face...Well, this is very accurate depiction of me...So no stealing this image to create a fake ID in my name please. Have some respect. I don't have curly hair, that's a little artistic flair I put in, some imagery to indicate that an artists career takes twists and turns, never a straight road. Oh, please forgive that little boo boo in the lower right corner. I dropped the pen.

OK, so no I didn't ingest some wacky mushrooms prior to writing this...Although I think the stick figure in my drawing might have...I'm just having some fun.

I'm really terrible at drawing as you can see. I mean terrible. Here's the thing though...I'm ok with it. Sure, I sometimes wish I could draw better but not strongly enough to do anything about it. I mean, I also sometimes wish I lived in a tree house on paradise island with an endless packet of nacho-cheese corn chips and a robot to do all the chores...It doesn't mean I want to invest any effort in doing so.

I come from a very artistic family. My father was an artist...You can see his scribble in the very first image...This is a doodle he did that I saved. The thing is, my artistic flair doesn't extend to drawing or painting. Not that I'm aware anyway, unless someone may call this stick man good work? Nah, didn't think so. I play the piano though, well; Played the trumpet and bass guitar in a jazz band and certainly think creatively. Is that art? Hmm, not sure. Maybe though.

I believe we all have talents and whilst they come out in various ways, they are still talents. Right? I'm not one of those people who says a person can be or do whatever they wish, it's a little naive. It doesn't mean I squash people's dreams, or my own...Just that I think it's important to play to one's strengths and to understand what can and can't be, or do.

Anyway, I don't want to get to deeply into it because this post is me just fucking around and having a little fun...Because I can...It's my blog after all.

I'd like to see some of your art though...Seriously. If you think you can draw as good as me I'd like to see it. You have to draw yourself though...You can use any media too. Pen and ink, charcoal, water-colours, oil paints, crayon...The pen on a string at the post Office...Your choice.


Design and create your ideal life, don't live it by default

Discord: @galenkp#9209 🇦🇺


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